No matter how old you are, an empty Christmas wrapping tube is still a fun thing to bonk someone over the head with.
More Quotes by Anonymous
Growing up is amazing, until you get old!
The most fun things in life are either immoral, illegal or they make you fat.
I was always taught to respect my elders and I've now reached the age when I don't have anybody to respect.
You know you are getting old when the candles on your birthday cake start to cost more than the cake itself.
I stretch my arms, I bend my knees, I straighten my neck, and they are all crunching. Conclusion: I'm not getting older, I'm getting more crunchy.
Some days I wish I had the wisdom of a 90 year old, the body of a 20 year old, and the energy of a 3 year old.
You know you're an adult when you get excited about a new cleaning sponge at the kitchen sink.
No matter how bad it gets I'm always rich when I go to the dollar store.
It's all fun and games until your jeans don't fit any more.
I always knew I'd get old. How fast it happened was a bit of a surprise though.
The older I get, the less surprised I'd be if a random body part just fell off one day.
My four moods: I'm too old for doing that. I'm too tired for doing that. I'm too sober for doing that. I don't have time for doing that.
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