It's easy to stop smoking. I stopped smoking today with no problems. I also stopped yesterday too, and the day before that.
Today was once tomorrow, and tomorrow will be today soon. CoolFunnyQuotes.com
Everyone has photographic memory; some just don't have the film. Anonymous
I am not a vegetarian because I love animals; I am a vegetarian because I hate plants.
It's true that we don't know what we've got until we lose it, but it's also true that we don't know what we've been missing until it arrives. Anonymous
Did you know electronics need smoke to work? Once the smoke comes out of them, they stop working. Anonymous
You laugh because I'm different........... I laugh cause I just farted! Anonymous
When I was kidnapped, my parents snapped into action. They rented out my room. Woody Allen
Everyone is entitled to their own opinion. It's just that yours is stupid. Anonymous
After twelve years of therapy my psychiatrist said something that brought tears to my eyes. He said, "No hablo ingles."
I have opinions of my own -- strong opinions -- but I don't always agree with them.
I told the doctor I broke my leg in two places. He told me to quit going to those places. Henny Youngman
Whenever I think of the past, it brings back so many memories... Steven Alexander Wright
When my boss asked me who is the stupid one, me or him? I told him everyone knows he doesn't hire stupid people. Anonymous
Two fleas are coming out of a bar when one asks the other 'Do we take a dog or do we walk home?' Anonymous
The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits. Albert Einstein