There are more important things in life than Facebook and Twitter,.. like watching TV, and having a beer.
I follow a rigorous exercise routine that I never get lazy about; fetching beer bottles from the fridge. CoolFunnyQuotes.com
Everyone needs to believe in something. I believe I'll have another beer. Anonymous
When I saw the monkeys at the zoo it reminded me of watching political debates on TV. CoolFunnyQuotes.com
Life is like a very long TV show, without a remote control. CoolFunnyQuotes.com
Whoever said great things come in small packages hasn't seen my big screen TV. CoolFunnyQuotes.com
He's so lazy that if there were work in bed, he would rather sleep on the floor.
Not all chemicals are bad. Without chemicals such as hydrogen and oxygen for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer. Dave Barry
Alcohol kills brain cells slowly, but that never bothered me because I'm not in a hurry. Anonymous
24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case. Coincidence? Steven Alexander Wright
Drinking after work is fine, but if you really want to enjoy working then drink before work. CoolFunnyQuotes.com
Ultimate lazy moment: Watching the sunrise on TV because you're too lazy to get up and watch it for real. CoolFunnyQuotes.com
What is the difference between having a cold beer and going to the bathroom? About 35 minutes. Anonymous
Most of us don't realize it, but we're all part of something much bigger than ourselves, and we're all connected in some way, not just through Facebook. Anonymous
I'm going to open a new Facebook account named 'Anonymous' so all the cool quotes will be attributed to me!
Facebook status: I'm not online, it's just an optical illusion. Anonymous
Long time ago I used to have a life, until someone told me to create a Facebook account. Anonymous
How do you know a man is thinking about his future? He buys two cases of beer instead of one. Anonymous
Relationships these days start by pressing LIKE on her photo. Anonymous
Let's have a beer together, you can open it and I will drink it. Anonymous
Alcohol, what's that? It's not in my vodkabulary, but let me check in whiskypedia. Anonymous