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The best advise I have for all my teachers during a test is to pass the test out as fast as possible before I forget everything.

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Never forget those who helped you along the way... Google, Wikipedia and Dictionary.

Anonymous
Not to brag or anything, but I can forget what I'm doing while I'm doing it. - Anonymous

Not to brag or anything, but I can forget what I'm doing while I'm doing it.

Anonymous
Remember: Don't Insult the Alligator till after you cross the river. - Anonymous

Remember: Don't Insult the Alligator till after you cross the river.

Anonymous

Time is a great teacher, but unfortunately it kills all its pupils.

Louis Hector Berlioz
Studying top moment: to exercise your memory and start sweating. - CoolFunnyQuotes.com

Studying top moment: to exercise your memory and start sweating.

CoolFunnyQuotes.com

Never under any circumstances take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.

Dave Barry
I'm not here to judge, I'm just pointing out all the mistakes you're making. - CoolFunnyQuotes.com

I'm not here to judge, I'm just pointing out all the mistakes you're making.

CoolFunnyQuotes.com
If what you've done is stupid but it works, then it really isn't that stupid at all. - David Letterman

If what you've done is stupid but it works, then it really isn't that stupid at all.

David Letterman

When I tried to do a search for marital advise on Google, it tried to finish my sentence for me, just like my wife does.

Anonymous
Photo of lioness sitting on grass with quotation about lion being afraid.

A zooology teacher asks the class 'What is the one animal in the jungle that a lion is afraid of?' The class answers: a lioness.

Anonymous
A clear conscience is the sure sign of a bad memory.

A clear conscience is the sure sign of a bad memory.

Mark Twain
Never test how deep the water is with both feet.

Never test how deep the water is with both feet.

Anonymous
Smartness runs in my family. When I went to school I was so smart my teacher was in my class for five years. - George Burns

Smartness runs in my family. When I went to school I was so smart my teacher was in my class for five years.

George Burns
Don't know where your kids are in the house? Turn off the internet and they'll show up quickly.

Don't know where your kids are in the house? Turn off the internet and they'll show up quickly.

Anonymous
They say "don't try this at home" so I'm coming over to your house to try it. - Anonymous

They say "don't try this at home" so I'm coming over to your house to try it.

Anonymous
Forget the butterflies, I feel the entire zoo in my stomach when I'm with you. - Anonymous

Forget the butterflies, I feel the entire zoo in my stomach when I'm with you.

Anonymous
Singing in the shower is all fun and games until you get shampoo in your mouth. Then it becomes a soap opera. - Anonymous

Singing in the shower is all fun and games until you get shampoo in your mouth. Then it becomes a soap opera.

Anonymous
Some things are better left unsaid, which I certainly realize, right after I say them. - Anonymous

Some things are better left unsaid, which I certainly realize, right after I say them.

Anonymous
I don't understand how I can remember every word of a song from 1984, but I can't remember why I walked into the kitchen. - Anonymous

I don't understand how I can remember every word of a song from 1984, but I can't remember why I walked into the kitchen.

Anonymous
Pro Tip: In the event of a tornado or other such natural disaster, place weiners and/or cheese slices in your pockets so the search dogs can find you first. - Anonymous

Pro Tip: In the event of a tornado or other such natural disaster, place weiners and/or cheese slices in your pockets so the search dogs can find you first.

Anonymous

What's your favorite childhood memory? Not paying bills.

Anonymous

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