How does the healthy dog bark? Ruff Ruff.
How does the cold dog bark ? Scarf Scarf.
How does the confused dog bark? Wutf? Wutf?
Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read. Groucho Marx
What did the dog say after walking in the desert for hours? If I don't find a tree soon I'm gonna pee on myself. Anonymous
Two fleas are coming out of a bar when one asks the other 'Do we take a dog or do we walk home?' Anonymous
Newspaper Ad. FREE PUPPIES: Half cocker spaniel, half sneaky neighbors dog. Anonymous
Dogs feel very strongly that they should always go with you in the car, in case the need should arise for them to bark violently at nothing, right in your ear. Dave Barry
If you want someone who will listen to you every time, do everything you tell them to do, and always be there for you for better or for worse, get a dog. Anonymous
For the best seat in the house, you'll have to move the dog. Anonymous
To a dog, a fire hydrant under maintenance is like a bathroom that's out of service. Anonymous
I was thinking of getting a German Shepherd once, but I didn't want to learn another language just to have a dog. Anonymous
I thought about losing weight once, but I don't like losing. Anonymous
If aliens saw us walking our dogs and picking up their poop, who would they think is in charge? CoolFunnyQuotes.com
You can trust your dog to guard your house but never trust your dog to guard your sandwich. Anonymous
Pro Tip: In the event of a tornado or other such natural disaster, place weiners and/or cheese slices in your pockets so the search dogs can find you first. Anonymous
Cat life mice can foxes be wolves boring frogs but grasshopper let's swan love it cow anyhow. Now read it again without the animals. CoolFunnyQuotes.com