Anonymous Funny Quotes

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A list of funny quotes that are written by an author that is not known or anonymous. Although not known, these amusing phrases must've had an author, so if you think you know who wrote any of them, please let us know.

How was the word "Wife" invented? They took the first two and last two letters of wildlife. Anonymous

Questions Wife Quotes

Some people call me crazy. I prefer the term happy with a twist. Anonymous

Happy Quotes Short Quotes

When things get hot, they expand, so I'm just getting warmer, not gaining weight. Anonymous

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Instead of cleaning my house, I just watch episodes of hoarders on TV and then I think "Wow, my house looks awesome!" Anonymous

Good morning self-isolation inmates! Anyone know how much vodka goes in scrambled eggs? Anonymous

Eat Quotes Good Quotes

I'm not feeling very worky today. Anonymous

Short Quotes Work Quotes

Happiness is a long walk, with a dog. Anonymous

Animals Dog Quotes Happy Quotes

When I say I miss school, I mean my friends and fun. Not the school. Anonymous

Friend Quotes Short Quotes

My superpower is holding onto stuff for years and throwing it away exactly one week before I need it. Anonymous

I'm so thankful I had a childhood before technology took over. Anonymous

Short Quotes

I wish I could invoice people for wasting my time. Anonymous

Short Quotes

Napping is the best activity for weight loss, because I can't eat anything when I'm asleep! Anonymous

Exercise Quotes Sleep Quotes

True love isn't about what's on the outside, it's about what's on the inside.... the wallet. Anonymous

Love Quotes Money Quotes

Website: We use cookies to improve our performance. Me: Same! Anonymous

Eat Quotes Short Quotes

The main function of the little toe on your foot is to make sure that all the objects and furniture in the house are in the correct place. Anonymous

Anonymous Funny Quotes

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