Anonymous Funny Quotes

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A list of funny quotes that are written by an author that is not known or anonymous. Although not known, these amusing phrases must've had an author, so if you think you know who wrote any of them, please let us know.

I'm in desperate need of a 6 month vacation... twice a year.
I'm in desperate need of a 6 month vacation... twice a year. Anonymous
Life Quotes Short Quotes Top 100
My hobbies include eating and complaining that I've gained too much weight. - Anonymous
My hobbies include eating and complaining that I've gained too much weight. Anonymous
Eat Quotes Life Quotes Short Quotes
Yes officer I saw the speed limit, I just didn't see your car. - Anonymous
Yes officer I saw the speed limit, I just didn't see your car. Anonymous
Short Quotes Top 100 Wise Quotes
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You don't have to be crazy to hang out with me... I'll train you. - Anonymous
You don't have to be crazy to hang out with me... I'll train you. Anonymous
Friend Quotes Short Quotes Top 100
I like my coffee so strong that it wakes up the neighbors. - Anonymous
I like my coffee so strong that it wakes up the neighbors. Anonymous
Life Quotes Short Quotes
My phone is like my lover, it's the last thing I see at night, and the first thing I wake up to every morning! Anonymous
Love Quotes Phone
Home: Where I can look ugly and not care. - Anonymous
Home: Where I can look ugly and not care. Anonymous
Life Quotes Short Quotes
I lost my teddy bear, can I sleep with you?
I lost my teddy bear, can I sleep with you? Anonymous
Love Quotes Short Quotes Sleep Quotes
Why is it called 'after dark' when it really is 'after light'? - Anonymous
Why is it called 'after dark' when it really is 'after light'? Anonymous
Questions Short Quotes
I always say "morning" instead of "good morning", because if it was a good morning, I'd still be asleep. - Anonymous
I always say "morning" instead of "good morning", because if it was a good morning, I'd still be asleep. Anonymous
Good Quotes Lazy Quotes Life Quotes
My grandpa's car is so old; when he parked in front of a museum, they towed his car inside the museum.
My grandpa's car is so old; when he parked in front of a museum, they towed his car inside the museum. Anonymous
Sayings Top 100
Sometimes I just want someone to hug me and say "I know it's hard, but you'll be okay. Here's a coffee and a million dollars." - Anonymous
Sometimes I just want someone to hug me and say "I know it's hard, but you'll be okay. Here's a coffee and a million dollars." Anonymous
Know Quotes Life Quotes Money Quotes
If you can't laugh at your own problems, call me and I'll laugh at them. - Anonymous
If you can't laugh at your own problems, call me and I'll laugh at them. Anonymous
Life Quotes People Quotes Phone
I only check my voice mail to get rid of the annoying little icon. - Anonymous
I only check my voice mail to get rid of the annoying little icon. Anonymous
Sayings Short Quotes Statements
Why cry for someone when you can laugh next to someone else?
Why cry for someone when you can laugh next to someone else? Anonymous
Love Quotes Questions Short Quotes

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