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One day my wife's credit card got stolen.

One day my wife's credit card got stolen.. what a relief it was to find that the thief spends less than my wife!

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Marriage is like a hot bath, once you get used to it it's not so hot any more. - Anonymous

Marriage is like a hot bath, once you get used to it it's not so hot any more. Anonymous

Marriage Quotes Short Quotes

Silence is golden. Too bad nobody is buying.

Silence is golden. Too bad nobody is buying. Anonymous

Short Quotes Wise Quotes

Me and my wife lived happily for twenty years.... then we met.

Me and my wife lived happily for twenty years.... then we met. Anonymous

Happy Quotes Marriage Quotes Short Quotes

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My advice to you is get married: if you find a good wife you'll be happy; if not, you'll become a philosopher.

Socrates

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Newspaper Ad. For sale: Encyclopedia Britannica, complete set of 45 volumes. No longer needed due to getting married. My wife knows everything. $200 Or best offer. - Anonymous

Newspaper Ad. For sale: Encyclopedia Britannica, complete set of 45 volumes. No longer needed due to getting married. My wife knows everything. $200 Or best offer. Anonymous

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In my house I'm the boss, my wife is just the decision maker.

In my house I'm the boss, my wife is just the decision maker. Woody Allen

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My wife dresses to kill. She cooks the same way. - Henny Youngman

My wife dresses to kill. She cooks the same way. Henny Youngman

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I always help my wife out with housework such as washing the dishes and doing the laundry. She washes them, and I let them dry. - Anonymous

I always help my wife out with housework such as washing the dishes and doing the laundry. She washes them, and I let them dry. Anonymous

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When I tried to do a search for marital advise on Google, it tried to finish my sentence for me, just like my wife does. Anonymous

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My wife never gives up. She is so insistent that she entered the wrong password over and over again until she managed to convince the computer that she's right! Anonymous

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My wife loves me so much, she tries her best to attract me to her. The other day she put on a perfume that smells like a computer. CoolFunnyQuotes.com

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I think I'm starting to have a problem with my vision, ever since I got married I haven't seen any money through the entire house. - CoolFunnyQuotes.com

I think I'm starting to have a problem with my vision, ever since I got married I haven't seen any money through the entire house. CoolFunnyQuotes.com

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My wife told me the other day that I don't take her to expensive places any more, so I took her to the gas station. - Anonymous

My wife told me the other day that I don't take her to expensive places any more, so I took her to the gas station. Anonymous

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If you want your wife to listen to you, then talk to another woman; she will be all ears. - Sigmund Freud

If you want your wife to listen to you, then talk to another woman; she will be all ears. Sigmund Freud

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I now pronounce you man and wife, you may now change your Facebook status.

I now pronounce you man and wife, you may now change your Facebook status. Anonymous

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Men are like bank accounts.<br/>
Without a lot of money they don't generate a lot of interest. - Anonymous

Men are like bank accounts.
Without a lot of money they don't generate a lot of interest. Anonymous

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If your wife wants to learn to drive, don't stand in her way. Sam Levenson

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If there is a "WILL", there are 500 relatives. Anonymous

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When there's a will, I want to be in it. Anonymous

Money Quotes Short Quotes Statements

Marriage is give and take. You'd better give it to her or she'll take it anyway. - Joey Adams

Marriage is give and take. You'd better give it to her or she'll take it anyway. Joey Adams

Marriage Quotes

I told my wife that a husband is like a fine wine; he gets better with age. The next day, she locked me in the cellar. - Anonymous

I told my wife that a husband is like a fine wine; he gets better with age. The next day, she locked me in the cellar. Anonymous

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