Marriage is the bond between a person who never remembers anniversaries and another who never forgets them.
You never run out of things that can go wrong.
Edward A. Murphy (Murphy's Law)
Alcohol kills brain cells slowly, but that never bothered me because I'm not in a hurry.
Newspaper Ad: Parachute for sale, used once, never opened!!
Never let a fool kiss you, or a kiss fool you.
My wife never gives up. She is so insistent that she entered the wrong password over and over again until she managed to convince the computer that she's right!
I never made a mistake in my life. I thought I did once, but I was wrong.
Charles M. Schulz
I always intended to pay for my sins, but I could never afford it.
The surest sign that there's intelligent life elsewhere in the universe, is that it has never contacted us.
Never play poker with the world's fastest animal, because he's a cheetah.
Your bank account can be overdrawn, but it can never be overfilled.
I never apologize. I’m sorry, but that’s just the way I am..
Be bold, be italic, but never regular.
If you had to identify in one word the reason why the human race has not achieved and never will achieve its full potential, that word would be 'meetings.'
Dear LOL, thank you for being there for me all those times I never had something else to say.
Never under any circumstances take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.
Never judge a book by it's movie
Have no fear of perfection, you'll never reach it.
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