My silence spoke a thousand words, but you never heard them.
I know how to live my life to the fullest.. but let's speak later after I finish playing some computer games. Anonymous
What are the three words guaranteed to humiliate men everywhere? 'Hold my purse.' Anonymous
What are the two magic words that you can always use to make a shark happy? "Man Overboard!" CoolFunnyQuotes.com
The most important four words for a successful marriage: 'I'll do the dishes.' Anonymous
Silence is golden, unless you have kids, then silence is just plain suspicious. Anonymous
You never realize what you have until it's gone. Toilet paper is a good example. Anonymous
The right to be heard does not include the right to be taken seriously. Anonymous
Today was once tomorrow, and tomorrow will be today soon. CoolFunnyQuotes.com
Math is fun, it teaches you life and death information, like when you're cold, you should go to a corner since it's 90 degrees there. Anonymous
Cat life mice can foxes be wolves boring frogs but grasshopper let's swan love it cow anyhow. Now read it again without the animals. CoolFunnyQuotes.com
I fear one day I'll meet God, he'll sneeze and I won't know what to say.
I think it's wrong that only one company makes the game Monopoly. Steven Alexander Wright
It doesn't make a difference what temperature a room is, it's always room temperature. Steven Alexander Wright
Whether you give a crap or don't give a crap, nobody wants crap anyway! CoolFunnyQuotes.com
I'm not here to judge, I'm just pointing out all the mistakes you're making. CoolFunnyQuotes.com
The broccoli says 'I look like a small tree', the mushroom says 'I look like an umbrella', the walnut says 'I look like a brain', and the banana says 'Can we please change the subject?' Anonymous
My neighbour asked if he could use my lawnmower and I told him of course he could, so long as he didn't take it out of my garden.
Happiness: The emotion that puts your face in motion. Fear: The emotion that puts your legs in motion. Anger: The emotion that puts your fist in motion. Lesson: Don't be afraid or angry and you won't have to run and fight. CoolFunnyQuotes.com