People who can fall asleep quickly freak me out... I mean, don't they have thoughts?
Those who snore always fall asleep first.
I'm off to club bed, featuring DJ Pillow and MC Blanky.
You know what part I like about waking up early? None.. let me go back to sleep.
At night, I can't fall asleep. In the morning, I can't get up.
The future is shaped by your dreams, so stop wasting time and go to sleep!
I have 206 bones, 650 muscles and 50 billion cells in my body. It takes time to wake up all of them up in the morning.
Why do they call it beauty sleep when you wake up looking terrible?
Dear sleep, I'm sorry we broke up this morning. I want you back!
I lost my teddy bear, can I sleep with you?
When I'm at work I can fall asleep instantly, but when I'm in my bed I can hardly fall asleep.
Spilling hot coffee on your lap wakes you up faster than drinking it.
Me: We need to fall asleep. Brain: No, let's stay awake and think about every decision we made today.
I was gonna take over the world today but I overslept. Postponed, again!
I'm so good at sleeping that I can do it with my eyes closed.
I believe there should be a better way to start each day... instead of waking up every morning.
He's so lazy that if there were work in bed, he would rather sleep on the floor.
Don't give up on your dreams so soon, sleep longer.
In the morning you beg to sleep more, in the afternoon you are dying to sleep, and at night you refuse to sleep.
Never under any circumstances take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.
They call it "fell asleep" but it should be more like "entered a mental state of regeneration."
Sleeping on my keyboard. If I answer, I'm talking in my sleep.
Dreaming permits each and every one of us to be quietly and safely insane every night of our lives.
Don't wake me up! I'm studying.
Dear sleep: thanks for trying, but you can't beat surfing the net.
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