When you wake up at 6 in the morning, you close your eyes for 5 minutes and it's already 6:45. When you're at work and it's 2:30, you close your eyes for 5 minutes and it's 2:31.
Drinking after work is fine, but if you really want to enjoy working then drink before work. CoolFunnyQuotes.com
I don't work on weekends, or any other day that ends with "Y". Anonymous
I used to work in a fire hydrant factory. You couldn't park anywhere near the place. Steven Alexander Wright
I'm in desperate need of a 6 month vacation... twice a year. Anonymous
Hate your job? Join our support group! It’s called EVERYBODY. We meet at the bar.
He's so lazy that if there were work in bed, he would rather sleep on the floor.
I don't need a hair stylist, my pillow gives me a new hairstyle every morning. Anonymous
The traffic is so slow today that I read two books, ate lunch, dinner, replied to all my emails, and I still haven't got to work yet. Anonymous
When people tell me "You're going to regret that in the morning," I sleep in until noon because I'm a problem solver. Anonymous
My boss told me "It's not rocket science." Yeah, almost everything that exists is not rocket science. CoolFunnyQuotes.com
You know what part I like about waking up early? None.. let me go back to sleep. Anonymous
I'm not sure how long my body can handle this "getting out of bed early in the morning" nonsense. Anonymous
Lies I tell myself: Just one more cookie. Just one more movie. Just one more minute. Anonymous
Legend says that when you can't sleep, it's because you're awake in someone's dream. So if everyone could stop dreaming about me, that would be great. Anonymous
Maybe if we all sit extremely still, Monday won't be able to see us. Anonymous
I always say "morning" instead of "good morning", because if it was a good morning, I'd still be asleep. Anonymous
You know that moment when you get up in the morning, you're full of energy and you can't wait to get to work? Me neither! Anonymous