I think I may need professional help... A chef, a butler and a maid should be enough.
We have to do the impossible, but it is possible.
Kevin Garnett
You never run out of things that can go wrong.
Edward A. Murphy (Murphy's Law)
Don't press your luck, you might pop it.
A clear conscience is the sure sign of a bad memory.
Everyone wants your best! Don't let them take it away from you.
I'm trying to think how I can think of what I want to think.
It's not true that I had nothing on. I had the radio on.
Marilyn Monroe
I wake up looking better every day, but today I'm exaggerating.
Think you're smart? Come over and help me with my homework.
I had an extremely busy day, converting oxygen into carbon dioxide.
If you're hotter than me, then that means I'm cooler than you.
Isn't it funny how red white and blue represent freedom, unless they're flashing behind you?
I think something's missing in my life... Like... 2-3 million dollars.
I don't think inside the box and I don't think outside the box... I don't even know where the box is.
Me: "I need help around here!" Then me again "No, not like that, here I'll do it."
Think of a number between 1 and 10. Multiply it by 9 and subtract 1. Now close your eyes. It's dark isn't it?
I want to sleep but my brain won't stop talking to itself.
I swallowed an ice cube yesterday and I haven't pooped it out yet. I'm really scared, you guys.
Today I bought a doughnut without sprinkles. This diet thing is hard.
