Dinosaurs never had coffee, and we see how that turned out.
More Quotes by Anonymous
I don't understand what's bothering you honey, I bring you coffee in bed every morning, all you have to do is grind it.
There are no stupid questions, just stupid people.
You laugh because I'm different........... I laugh cause I just farted!
Flying is learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss.
When I was kidnapped, my parents snapped into action. They rented out my room.
I have opinions of my own -- strong opinions -- but I don't always agree with them.
I told the doctor I broke my leg in two places. He told me to quit going to those places.
Whenever I think of the past, it brings back so many memories...
It's easy to stop smoking. I stopped smoking today with no problems. I also stopped yesterday too, and the day before that.
When my boss asked me who is the stupid one, me or him? I told him everyone knows he doesn't hire stupid people.
Newspaper ad: Hiring clowns, must be serious.
Two fleas are coming out of a bar when one asks the other 'Do we take a dog or do we walk home?'
The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits.
Sometimes when I close my eyes, I can't see.
Gravity is a contributing factor in nearly 73 percent of all accidents involving falling objects.
It's so simple to be wise. Just think of something stupid to say and then don't say it.
I used to work in a fire hydrant factory. You couldn't park anywhere near the place.
If I could be a bird, I'd be a Flying Purple People Eater because then people would sing about me and I could fly down and eat them because I hate that song.
Don't be stupid, it might make you famous.
The last thing that blew my mind was the wind.
When inspiration does not come to me, I go halfway to meet it.
