What animal can jump higher than a house? Any animal that can jump at all, because houses can't jump.
In my house I'm the boss, my wife is just the decision maker. Woody Allen
All of us have moments in our lives that test our courage. Taking children into a house with a white carpet is one of them. Erma Bombeck
I wish that all of my enemies had three cars parked in front of their house. An ambulance, fire truck and police car. Anonymous
I hate it when people see me at the supermarket and they're like 'Hey, what are you doing here?' I tell them 'You know.. hunting elephants.' Anonymous
Some days, you're the pigeon, some days you're the statue, just live with it. Anonymous
You're riding a horse full speed, and there's a giraffe on your left and a lion chasing you from behind, so what do you do? Get off the carousel! Anonymous
Never play poker with the world's fastest animal, because he's a cheetah. Anonymous
Why do gorillas have big nostrils? Because they have thick fingers. Anonymous
You know the speed of light; so what is the speed of dark? Anonymous
Who are you and how did you get in here? Frank: I'm a locksmith. And... I'm a locksmith...
How many roads must a man walk down before he admits he's lost? Anonymous
I am not a vegetarian because I love animals; I am a vegetarian because I hate plants.
Why is the sky blue? Sure there is an explanation, but lets just be thankful it's not red! CoolFunnyQuotes.com