Anonymous Funny Quotes

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A list of funny quotes that are written by an author that is not known or anonymous. Although not known, these amusing phrases must've had an author, so if you think you know who wrote any of them, please let us know.

Husband: I am a grown man, stop mothering me. Also husband: Have you seen my keys? Have you seen my wallet? Where did we park? I don't have clean underwear. Anonymous

Life Quotes Marriage Quotes

My wife loves me so much, she tries her best to attract me to her. The other day she put on a perfume that smells like a computer. Anonymous

Computers Marriage Quotes Wife Quotes

I used to think I was indecisive, but I'm not too sure any more. Anonymous

Short Quotes Think Quotes

Don't believe everything fortune cookies tells you. Just because they're sweet doesn't mean they're right. Anonymous

Eat Quotes

I'm looking to buy a new boomerang, how can I throw the old one out? Anonymous

Short Quotes Stupid Quotes

Dear mathematicians: Stop asking us to find your x. She has a new boyfriend. Anonymous

Math Quotes Short Quotes

We should start referring to age as "levels." So when you're level 80, it sounds a lot cooler than just being an older person. Anonymous

There is no better moment to postpone something you don't want to do other than right now. Anonymous

Lazy Quotes Moments Sayings

Bathroom sign above toilet: It's like basketball, the basket is bigger than the ball! Learn to score properly! Anonymous

Stupid Quotes

To a dog, a fire hydrant under maintenance is like a bathroom that's out of service. Anonymous

Animals Dog Quotes

I get most of my exercise these days from shaking my head in disbelief. Anonymous

Exercise Quotes Short Quotes

You're like a sharpie - super fine. Anonymous

Short Quotes

I might get a job cleaning mirrors. It's definitely a job I can see myself doing. Anonymous

Work Quotes

Whether you give a crap or don't give a crap, nobody wants crap anyway! Anonymous

Short Quotes Witty Quotes

My boss told me "It's not rocket science." Yeah, almost everything that exists is not rocket science. - CoolFunnyQuotes.com

My boss told me "It's not rocket science." Yeah, almost everything that exists is not rocket science. Anonymous

Anonymous Funny Quotes

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