George Burns Quote

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It takes only one drink to get me drunk. The trouble is, I can't remember if it's the thirteenth or the fourteenth.

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The problem with drinking and driving is that trees defend themselves very well. - CoolFunnyQuotes.com

The problem with drinking and driving is that trees defend themselves very well.

CoolFunnyQuotes.com

Drinking after work is fine, but if you really want to enjoy working then drink before work.

CoolFunnyQuotes.com

Not all chemicals are bad. Without chemicals such as hydrogen and oxygen for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer.

In beer there is freedom, in wine there is health, in cognac there is power and in water there is bacteria. - Anonymous

In beer there is freedom, in wine there is health, in cognac there is power and in water there is bacteria.

When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading. - Henny Youngman

When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading.

I follow a rigorous exercise routine that I never get lazy about; fetching beer bottles from the fridge.

I follow a rigorous exercise routine that I never get lazy about; fetching beer bottles from the fridge.

CoolFunnyQuotes.com

Alcohol kills brain cells slowly, but that never bothered me because I'm not in a hurry.

Alcohol kills brain cells slowly, but that never bothered me because I'm not in a hurry.

What is the difference between having a cold beer and going to the bathroom? About 35 minutes.

I started thinking about the dangers of drinking on new year's eve. After that, I decided to stop thinking. - Anonymous

I started thinking about the dangers of drinking on new year's eve. After that, I decided to stop thinking.

A glass of beer shortens your life by one minute, a glass of wine by two minutes, and a day of work by seven to ten hours.

A glass of beer shortens your life by one minute, a glass of wine by two minutes, and a day of work by seven to ten hours.

How do you know a man is thinking about his future? He buys two cases of beer instead of one. - Anonymous

How do you know a man is thinking about his future? He buys two cases of beer instead of one.

Beer together

Let's have a beer together, you can open it and I will drink it.

Alcohol, what's that? It's not in my vodkabulary, but let me check in whiskypedia.

Alcohol, what's that? It's not in my vodkabulary, but let me check in whiskypedia.

Hate your job? Join our support group! It’s called EVERYBODY. We meet at the bar.

Hate your job? Join our support group! It’s called EVERYBODY. We meet at the bar.

Drew Carey

Don't drink to forget me, you'll end up seeing me double. - Anonymous

Don't drink to forget me, you'll end up seeing me double.

Give a man a fish and he will have food for one day. Teach him to catch fish and he will spend all day at the lake drinking beer.

Give a man a fish and he will have food for one day. Teach him to catch fish and he will spend all day at the lake drinking beer.

I don't have a drinking problem, I have thirst problem.

I don't have a drinking problem, I have thirst problem.

I drank so much Vodka last night that this morning I woke up with a Russian accent. - Anonymous

I drank so much Vodka last night that this morning I woke up with a Russian accent.

Everyone should believe in something. I believe I should be on a beach drinking margaritas. - Anonymous

Everyone should believe in something. I believe I should be on a beach drinking margaritas.

Not to brag but I don't even need alcohol to make really bad decisions. - Anonymous

Not to brag but I don't even need alcohol to make really bad decisions.

The problem with drinking and driving is that trees defend themselves very well. - CoolFunnyQuotes.com

The problem with drinking and driving is that trees defend themselves very well.

CoolFunnyQuotes.com

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