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I once had a job in a orange juice factory, but I got canned because I couldn't concentrate. - Anonymous

I once had a job in a orange juice factory, but I got canned because I couldn't concentrate.

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To make a mistake is human, but to blame it on someone else, that's even more human.

To make a mistake is human, but to blame it on someone else, that's even more human.

Anonymous
Sayings

If you don't like your job, you don't strike! You just go in every day, and do it really half assed. That's the American way. - Homer Simpson

Simpsons
Stupid Quotes Work Quotes
Everyone has photographic memory; some just don't have the film. - Anonymous

Everyone has photographic memory; some just don't have the film.

Anonymous
Sayings Short Quotes Statements

After twelve years of therapy my psychiatrist said something that brought tears to my eyes. He said, "No hablo ingles."

Ronnie Shakes
Sayings Stupid Quotes

Whatever it is -- I didn't do it!

Anonymous
Sayings Short Quotes Statements
It's true that we don't know what we've got until we lose it, but it's also true that we don't know what we've been missing until it arrives. - Anonymous

It's true that we don't know what we've got until we lose it, but it's also true that we don't know what we've been missing until it arrives.

Anonymous
Know Quotes Sayings Statements

Today was once tomorrow, and tomorrow will be today soon.

CoolFunnyQuotes.com
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Math is fun, it teaches you life and death information, like when you're cold, you should go to a corner since it's 90 degrees there. - Anonymous

Math is fun, it teaches you life and death information, like when you're cold, you should go to a corner since it's 90 degrees there.

Anonymous
Life Quotes Math Quotes Witty Quotes
When my boss told me this is the fifth time I'm late, I smiled and thought to myself, it's Friday!! - Anonymous

When my boss told me this is the fifth time I'm late, I smiled and thought to myself, it's Friday!!

Anonymous
Time Quotes Work Quotes
Cat life mice can foxes be wolves boring frogs but grasshopper let's swan love it cow anyhow. Now read it again without the animals. - CoolFunnyQuotes.com

Cat life mice can foxes be wolves boring frogs but grasshopper let's swan love it cow anyhow. Now read it again without the animals.

CoolFunnyQuotes.com
Animals Cat Quotes Life Quotes
You're born free, then you're taxed to death.

You're born free, then you're taxed to death.

Anonymous
Famous Quotes Sayings Short Quotes
If you don't succeed at first, hide all evidence that you tried. - Anonymous

If you don't succeed at first, hide all evidence that you tried.

Anonymous
Sayings Short Quotes Top 100
The probability of meeting someone you know increases a hundredfold when you're with someone you're not supposed to be seen with.

The probability of meeting someone you know increases a hundredfold when you're with someone you're not supposed to be seen with.

Anonymous
Know Quotes Sayings
Don't ask me anything, and I won't tell you any lies.

Don't ask me anything, and I won't tell you any lies.

Anonymous
Sayings Short Quotes Stupid Quotes
I love my job only when I'm on vacation.

I love my job only when I'm on vacation.

CoolFunnyQuotes.com
Lazy Quotes Love Quotes Sayings

I fear one day I'll meet God, he'll sneeze and I won't know what to say.

Ronnie Shakes
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I think it's wrong that only one company makes the game Monopoly.

Steven Alexander Wright
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You know when you put a stick in water and it looks bent? That's why I never take baths.

Steven Alexander Wright
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It doesn't make a difference what temperature a room is, it's always room temperature.

Steven Alexander Wright
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Whether you give a crap or don't give a crap, nobody wants crap anyway!

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Don't be stupid, it might make you famous. - CoolFunnyQuotes.com

Don't be stupid, it might make you famous.

CoolFunnyQuotes.com
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