Have you ever wanted to grab somebody by the shoulders, give them a good shake and whisper "Nobody cares!"
I just wanted you to know that somebody cares. Not me, but somebody does. Anonymous
If you keep annoying me, I'll give your phone number to all the kids and tell them it's Santa's hotline. Anonymous
Those who think they know it all are very annoying to those of us who actually do. Anonymous
I love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
Have you ever looked at someone and knew the wheel was turning, but the hamster fell off long time ago? Anonymous
Do you ever go out, and then something happens and you think to yourself 'this is exactly why I don't go out'? Anonymous
Did you ever notice, whenever you need your keys the most, that's when they're the hardest to find? Anonymous
Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac? George Carlin