People say I act like I don't care. It's not an act.
More Quotes by Anonymous
When people tell me "You're going to regret that in the morning," I sleep in until noon because I'm a problem solver.
I don't like morning people... or mornings, or people.
I don't know how to act my age because I've never been this old before.
I hate it when people text "Call me." I'm going to start calling people and as soon as they answer I'll say "text me," then hang up.
Lazy people fact #2347827309018287. You were too lazy to read that number.
There are so many times I made you angry, upset, irritated and tired. Today I just wanted to say that I'm thinking of continuing.
A lot of people ask me if I were shipwrecked, and could only have one book, what would it be? I always say 'How to Build a Boat.'
Steven Alexander Wright
An apple a day keeps anyone anyway, if you throw it hard enough.
Don't mess with me, I know Karate, Judo, Jujitsu, Kung Fu and 20 other dangerous words.
I'm a Victoria's Secret model. It's such a secret, not even Victoria knows.
I was gonna take over the world today but I overslept. Postponed, again!
Sunglasses: allowing you to stare at people without getting caught. It's like Facebook in real life.
Home: Where I can look ugly and not care.
Whoever invented knock knock jokes should get a "No Bell" prize.
I hate when people ask me what I'm doing tomorrow, I don't even know what I'm doing today.
If Facebook has taught us anything it's that a lot of people aren't quite ready for a spelling bee.
Some people aren't just missing a screw, the whole toolbox is gone.
Don't vacuum and listen to loud music on your headphones in the same time. I finished three rooms until I realized the vacuum wasn't even on.
People who can fall asleep quickly freak me out... I mean, don't they have thoughts?
That moment when you dip your cookie in milk for too long and it breaks off, then you wonder why bad things happen to good people.
CoolFunnyQuotes.com © 2016