Anonymous Funny Quotes

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A list of funny quotes that are written by an author that is not known or anonymous. Although not known, these amusing phrases must've had an author, so if you think you know who wrote any of them, please let us know.

I'm like Pacman when I'm at a party, I eat everything and run away from anyone coming close to me. - Anonymous
I'm like Pacman when I'm at a party, I eat everything and run away from anyone coming close to me. Anonymous
Analogies Eat Quotes Top 100
As long as everything is exactly the way I want it.. I'm totally flexible. - Anonymous
As long as everything is exactly the way I want it.. I'm totally flexible. Anonymous
Short Quotes Top 100 Wise Quotes
I'll call it a smartphone when I yell "Where's my phone?" and it yells back "Down here in the couch cushions!" - Anonymous
I'll call it a smartphone when I yell "Where's my phone?" and it yells back "Down here in the couch cushions!" Anonymous
Phone Top 100
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Today I bought a doughnut without sprinkles. This diet thing is hard. Anonymous
Eat Quotes Sayings Short Quotes
Forget the butterflies, I feel the entire zoo in my stomach when I'm with you. - Anonymous
Forget the butterflies, I feel the entire zoo in my stomach when I'm with you. Anonymous
Love Quotes Short Quotes
Maybe there are no excuses to be lazy, but I'm still going to keep looking. - Anonymous
Maybe there are no excuses to be lazy, but I'm still going to keep looking. Anonymous
Lazy Quotes Short Quotes
I don't understand, but I also don't care... so it works out. - Anonymous
I don't understand, but I also don't care... so it works out. Anonymous
Short Quotes Witty Quotes
Give me a photo of you so I can show Santa what I want for Christmas.
Give me your photo so I can show Santa what I want for Christmas. Anonymous
Love Quotes Short Quotes Top 100
I'm not being smart, I'm just a skilled trained professional in pointing out the obvious. - Anonymous
I'm not being smart, I'm just a skilled trained professional in pointing out the obvious. Anonymous
Witty Quotes
Do you ever go out, and then something happens ...
Do you ever go out, and then something happens and you think to yourself 'this is exactly why I don't go out'? Anonymous
Questions Think Quotes Top 100
I hate it when people see me at the supermarket and they're like 'Hey, what are you doing here?' I tell them 'You know.. hunting elephants.'
I hate it when people see me at the supermarket and they're like 'Hey, what are you doing here?' I tell them 'You know.. hunting elephants.' Anonymous
Know Quotes Moments People Quotes
If you think nobody cares that you're alive try missing a couple of payments. Anonymous
Life Quotes Short Quotes
Camping: When you spend a small fortune to live like somebody poor. - Anonymous
Camping: When you spend a small fortune to live like somebody poor. Anonymous
Analogies Money Quotes Short Quotes
Pool rules: You're not allowed to do anything that begins with the words 'Hey everyone watch this!' - Anonymous
Pool rules: You're not allowed to do anything that begins with the words 'Hey everyone watch this!' Anonymous
Top 100 Witty Quotes
The trick is to not let people know how weird you are until it's too late for them to back out. - Anonymous
The trick is to not let people know how weird you are until it's too late for them to back out. Anonymous
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