Joey Adams Quote

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Marriage is give and take. You'd better give it to her or she'll take it anyway. - Joey Adams

Marriage is give and take. You'd better give it to her or she'll take it anyway.

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Marriage Quotes

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Marriage is a wonderful institution... but who wants to live in an institution? - Groucho Marx

Marriage is a wonderful institution... but who wants to live in an institution? Groucho Marx

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Keep your eyes wide open before marriage, half shut afterwards. Benjamin Franklin

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The most important four words for a successful marriage: 'I'll do the dishes.'

The most important four words for a successful marriage: 'I'll do the dishes.' Anonymous

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The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think. Anonymous

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I love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.

I love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.

Rita Rudner

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Me and my wife lived happily for twenty years.... then we met.

Me and my wife lived happily for twenty years.... then we met. Anonymous

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Behind every successful man is a surprised woman. - Maryon Pearson

Behind every successful man is a surprised woman.

Maryon Pearson

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Newspaper Ad. For sale: Encyclopedia Britannica, complete set of 45 volumes. No longer needed due to getting married. My wife knows everything. $200 Or best offer. - Anonymous

Newspaper Ad. For sale: Encyclopedia Britannica, complete set of 45 volumes. No longer needed due to getting married. My wife knows everything. $200 Or best offer. Anonymous

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When a couple is arguing over who loves who more, the one that gives up is the real winner.

When a couple is arguing over who loves who more, the one that gives up is the real winner. CoolFunnyQuotes.com

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Marriage is the bond between a person who never remembers anniversaries and another who never forgets them.

Marriage is the bond between a person who never remembers anniversaries and another who never forgets them.

Ogden Nash

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I don't understand what's bothering you honey, I bring you coffee in bed every morning, all you have to do is grind it. - Anonymous

I don't understand what's bothering you honey, I bring you coffee in bed every morning, all you have to do is grind it. Anonymous

Some relationships are like Tom and Jerry, they argue and disagree all the time, but they still can't live without each other. - Anonymous

Some relationships are like Tom and Jerry, they argue and disagree all the time, but they still can't live without each other. Anonymous

My prince is not coming on a white horse... He's obviously riding a turtle, and definitely lost.

My prince is not coming on a white horse... He's obviously riding a turtle, and definitely lost. Anonymous

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Marriage is like a hot bath, once you get used to it it's not so hot any more. - Anonymous

Marriage is like a hot bath, once you get used to it it's not so hot any more. Anonymous

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Single and ready to get nervous around anyone I find attractive. - Anonymous

Single and ready to get nervous around anyone I find attractive. Anonymous

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Marriage is like a walk in the park... Jurrasic Park. - Anonymous

Marriage is like a walk in the park... Jurrasic Park. Anonymous

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Sometime you meet such a prince that you'd rather marry the horse. - Anonymous

Sometime you meet such a prince that you'd rather marry the horse. Anonymous

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My advice to you is get married: if you find a good wife you'll be happy; if not, you'll become a philosopher.

Socrates

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In my house I'm the boss, my wife is just the decision maker.

In my house I'm the boss, my wife is just the decision maker. Woody Allen

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My wife dresses to kill. She cooks the same way. - Henny Youngman

My wife dresses to kill. She cooks the same way. Henny Youngman

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When you see a married couple walking down the street, the one that's a few steps ahead is the one that's mad. - Helen Rowland

When you see a married couple walking down the street, the one that's a few steps ahead is the one that's mad.

Helen Rowland

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