The most important four words for a successful marriage: 'I'll do the dishes.' Anonymous
Marriage is the bond between a person who never remembers anniversaries and another who never forgets them.
Marriage is give and take. You'd better give it to her or she'll take it anyway. Joey Adams
Marriage is a wonderful institution... but who wants to live in an institution? Groucho Marx
Keep your eyes wide open before marriage, half shut afterwards. Benjamin Franklin
Marriage is like a hot bath, once you get used to it it's not so hot any more. Anonymous
Our love is like a train with no brakes, unstoppable. Anonymous
Me and my wife lived happily for twenty years.... then we met. Anonymous
If you want your wife to listen to you, then talk to another woman; she will be all ears. Sigmund Freud
I now pronounce you man and wife, you may now change your Facebook status. Anonymous
I didn't find out what happiness means until I got married... and then it was too late. Anonymous
Some relationships are like Tom and Jerry, they argue and disagree all the time, but they still can't live without each other. Anonymous
When you see a married couple walking down the street, the one that's a few steps ahead is the one that's mad.
My wife told me the other day that I don't take her to expensive places any more, so I took her to the gas station. Anonymous
For you, I would swim across the ocean. LOL, just kidding, there are sharks in there. Anonymous
My grandpa started walking five miles a day when he was 60. Now he's 97 years old and we have no clue where he is. Anonymous
My biggest fear about becoming a zombie is all the walking that I'd have to do. Anonymous
Sometime you meet such a prince that you'd rather marry the horse. Anonymous
My advice to you is get married: if you find a good wife you'll be happy; if not, you'll become a philosopher.