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What's happening with your phone, every time I call you it says 'The subscriber you're calling is a monkey, please contact the zoo.'
Anonymous
I'll call it a smartphone when I yell "Where's my phone?" and it yells back "Down here in the couch cushions!"
Anonymous
Girls are like phones. We love to be held and talked to, but if you press the wrong button you'll be disconnected!
Anonymous
Dogs feel very strongly that they should always go with you in the car, in case the need should arise for them to bark violently at nothing, right in your ear.
Dave Barry
Being angry is not necessarily bad, some the best things were invented by angry people. Lamborghini didn't produce a single car until Enzo Ferrari made him angry.
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The most important thing in life is not knowing everything, it's having the phone number of somebody who does!
Anonymous
According to Archimedes' principle, what happens when you jump in a bathtub full of water? Answer: The phone rings.
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When a man gets close to a woman wearing a leather mini-skirt, his heart starts beating faster, his throat gets dry, his knees get weak and he becomes irrational.. Why? Because the leather smells like a new car.
Anonymous