I hate Mondays, Tuesdays, Wednesdays, Thursdays, and half of Fridays.
I always give 100% at work! 12% on Monday, 23% on Tuesday, 40% on Wednesday, 20% on Thursday and 5% on Friday. Welcome back weekend.
Why is Monday so far from Friday, and Friday so close to Monday?
Nothing messes up your Friday like realizing it's only Thursday.
When my boss told me this is the fifth time I'm late, I smiled and thought to myself, it's Friday!!
After (M)onday and (T)uesday comes WTF !
If it's the fifth day in a row that you don't feel like working, it means it's finally Friday!
Stop crying, Monday will be over soon.
If Monday had a face... I would punch it.
On Mercury a day lasts 1,408 hours. Just like every Monday does on Earth.
Don't worry, better days are coming. They are called Friday, Saturday and Sunday.
Maybe if we all sit extremely still, Monday won't be able to see us.
There's just one legitimate synonym for Friday: boom shakalaka.
When someone asks where you see yourself in 5 years... Buddy, I'm just trying to make it to Friday.
Just once I'd like to wake up, turn on the news, and hear "Monday has been cancelled," and then go back to sleep.
If you don't like your job, you don't strike! You just go in every day, and do it really half assed. That's the American way. - Homer Simpson
Hard work never killed anybody, but why take a chance?
Drinking after work is fine, but if you really want to enjoy working then drink before work.
When my boss asked me who is the stupid one, me or him? I told him everyone knows he doesn't hire stupid people.
I love my job only when I'm on vacation.
If you had to identify in one word the reason why the human race has not achieved and never will achieve its full potential, that word would be 'meetings.'
I used to work in a fire hydrant factory. You couldn't park anywhere near the place.
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