Anonymous Quote

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Dear Santa, this year I'd like a fat bank account, and a thin body... please don't confuse the two like you did last time.

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If you keep annoying me, I'll give your phone number to all the kids and tell them it's Santa's hotline.

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Christmas is a competition between who gives up first: Your feet or your wallet.

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I love my six pack so much, I protect is with a layer of fat.

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It's simple, if it jiggles, it's fat.

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Just got 30 minutes of cardio trying to pick up an ice cube from the kitchen floor.

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I used to be a banker, but then I lost interest.

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Santa saw your Facebook posts. This year you're getting a dictionary.

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Pleasing everyone, that's impossible. Making everyone angry, piece of cake!

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