Some people aren't just missing a screw, the whole toolbox is gone.
Some people are like clouds. When they go away, it's a brighter day. Anonymous
Some people walk into our lives and leave footprints on our hearts. Others walk into our lives and we want to leave footprints on their face! Anonymous
I'm the kind of crazy you weren't warned about because no one knew this level existed. Anonymous
Be crazy, be stupid, be silly, be weird. Be whatever, because life is too short to be anything but happy. Anonymous
I may not know Karate, but I know crazy and I'm not afraid to use it. Anonymous
I don't know about you guys, but when I have to make a decision I analyze the situation, evaluate the risk, take measures to limit the consequences and then I completely screw up. Anonymous
All positions for annoying people in my life have been filled. Applicants need not apply, thank you. Anonymous
Some cause happiness wherever they go; others whenever they go. Anonymous
If I could be a bird, I'd be a Flying Purple People Eater because then people would sing about me and I could fly down and eat them because I hate that song.
A stupid person laughs three times at a joke; once when everyone else is laughing, a second time when he actually gets the joke, and a third time when he realizes he was laughing without getting the joke at first. Anonymous
Cell phones these days keep getting thinner and smarter... people the opposite. Anonymous
All of us light up a room, some when they enter, others when they leave. Anonymous
It's easy to identify people who can't count to ten. They're in front of you in the supermarket express lane.
A celebrity is a person who works hard all his life to become well known, then wears dark glasses to avoid being recognized.