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My kitchen cleaner says "for a clean kitchen" so I can't use it, mine is dirty.

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Make yourself at home... clean my kitchen. Anonymous

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My house was clean yesterday, sorry you missed it. Anonymous

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If you eat in the kitchen, your room is always clean, and you go to sleep at 9 o'clock, it means you don't have Internet!! Anonymous

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Taking a shower is awesome, it makes you feel nice and clean, makes you sound like a great singer, and helps you make all of life's decisions. Anonymous

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Whenever I clean my closet I take a GPS with me, so I can find my way back. Anonymous

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You know you're an adult when you get excited about a new cleaning sponge at the kitchen sink. Anonymous

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I just cleaned the house top to bottom, so now I'm gonna need everybody to stop living here. Anonymous

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Mom: Why is everything on the floor? Me: Gravity, mom. Anonymous

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Today was once tomorrow, and tomorrow will be today soon. CoolFunnyQuotes.com

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$Math is fun, it teaches you life and death information, like when you're cold, you should go to a corner since it's 90 degrees there. - Anonymous$

Math is fun, it teaches you life and death information, like when you're cold, you should go to a corner since it's 90 degrees there. Anonymous

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Cat life mice can foxes be wolves boring frogs but grasshopper let's swan love it cow anyhow. Now read it again without the animals. CoolFunnyQuotes.com

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I fear one day I'll meet God, he'll sneeze and I won't know what to say.

Ronnie Shakes

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I think it's wrong that only one company makes the game Monopoly. Steven Alexander Wright

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It doesn't make a difference what temperature a room is, it's always room temperature. Steven Alexander Wright

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Whether you give a crap or don't give a crap, nobody wants crap anyway! CoolFunnyQuotes.com

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I'm not here to judge, I'm just pointing out all the mistakes you're making. CoolFunnyQuotes.com

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The broccoli says 'I look like a small tree', the mushroom says 'I look like an umbrella', the walnut says 'I look like a brain', and the banana says 'Can we please change the subject?' Anonymous

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My neighbour asked if he could use my lawnmower and I told him of course he could, so long as he didn't take it out of my garden.

Eric Morecambe

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Happiness: The emotion that puts your face in motion. Fear: The emotion that puts your legs in motion. Anger: The emotion that puts your fist in motion. Lesson: Don't be afraid or angry and you won't have to run and fight. CoolFunnyQuotes.com

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Three monkeys escaped from the zoo, one was caught watching TV, the other playing hockey, and the third one was caught reading this quote! Anonymous

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If we were on a sinking ship, and there was only one life vest... I would miss you so much. Anonymous

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