If I had 10 cookies and you took half, do you know what you would have? That's right, a black eye and a broken hand.
More Quotes by Anonymous
A cookie a day keeps the sadness away. An entire jar of cookies a day brings it back.
Don't believe everything fortune cookies tells you. Just because they're sweet doesn't mean they're right.
If you eat in the kitchen, your room is always clean, and you go to sleep at 9 o'clock, it means you don't have Internet!!
Fortune cookie: You'll have a better fortune in the next cookie.
Whenever I am sad I go to my favorite place... the fridge.
Friends buy you food. Best friends eat your food.
If we shouldn't eat at night, why is there a light in the fridge?
I'm like Pacman when I'm at a party, I eat everything and run away from anyone coming close to me.
Being a beaver is nice, if you're hungry you just eat a piece of your home.
Math: the only place where you have to figure out the ratio of yellow candy to blue candy when all you're thinking about is eating them.
I'm just going to flip this omelette... Okay, we're having scrambled eggs.
Lies I tell myself: Just one more cookie. Just one more movie. Just one more minute.
Making food: 1 hour. Eating food: 20 seconds. Washing dishes: never ending.
I'm gonna order a pizza 5 minutes before the new year, then when it arrives I'll say I ordered this last year.
Yesterday I really wanted tacos, and now I'm eating tacos. Follow your dreams!
I eat cake every day because somewhere out there it's someone's birthday and I like to celebrate.
Sit down and let me tell you a story. Once upon a time I was hungry, and that's what happened to all your chocolate.
Diet day #1: All the unhealthy food has been removed from the house. It was delicious.
Every time we try to eat healthy along comes Christmas, Easter, summer, Friday, or Tuesday and ruins it for us.
"Made with love," means I licked the spoon and kept using it.
My wife dresses to kill. She cooks the same way.
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