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Good morning self-isolation inmates! Anyone know how much vodka goes in scrambled eggs? - Anonymous

Good morning self-isolation inmates! Anyone know how much vodka goes in scrambled eggs?

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How do I like my eggs? In a cake. - Anonymous

How do I like my eggs? In a cake. Anonymous

Eat Quotes Questions Short Quotes

I'm just going to flip this omelette... Okay, we're having scrambled eggs. - Anonymous

I'm just going to flip this omelette... Okay, we're having scrambled eggs. Anonymous

Eat Quotes Sayings Short Quotes

I always say "morning" instead of "good morning", because if it was a good morning, I'd still be asleep. - Anonymous

I always say "morning" instead of "good morning", because if it was a good morning, I'd still be asleep. Anonymous

Good Quotes Lazy Quotes Life Quotes

My wife dresses to kill. She cooks the same way. - Henny Youngman

My wife dresses to kill. She cooks the same way. Henny Youngman

Eat Quotes Marriage Quotes Short Quotes

I am on a 20 day diet, so far I've lost 10 days.

I am on a 20 day diet, so far I've lost 10 days. Anonymous

Eat Quotes Exercise Quotes Short Quotes

A cookie a day keeps the sadness away. An entire jar of cookies a day brings it back.

A cookie a day keeps the sadness away. An entire jar of cookies a day brings it back. Anonymous

Eat Quotes

A fisherman who just caught a huge salmon reels the fish in, looks at the fish and says 'I am taking you for tonight's dinner!' The fish replies 'I already ate, can we go somewhere else?' Anonymous

Animals Eat Quotes

You can trust your dog to guard your house.

You can trust your dog to guard your house but never trust your dog to guard your sandwich. Anonymous

Animals Dog Quotes Eat Quotes

Near year 2013, resolutions you can keep.

New year resolutions you can actually keep!
Skip more classes in school.
Call in sick at work more.
Go shopping more often.
Eat more unhealthy food like fries and burgers.
Drink more pop cans instead of freshly squeezing healthy fruits.
Do less exercise and watch more TV.
Anonymous

Eat Quotes Exercise Quotes Stupid Quotes

I am on a seafood diet. I see food, and I eat it.

I am on a seafood diet. I see food, and I eat it. Anonymous

Eat Quotes Sayings Short Quotes

I'm so sorry about what I said when I was hungry.

I'm so sorry about what I said when I was hungry. Anonymous

Eat Quotes Moments Short Quotes

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