Flying is learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss.

See all Quotes by Douglas Adams

I'm not afraid of flying, I'm afraid of not flying.

CoolFunnyQuotes.com

If I could be a bird, I'd be a Flying Purple People Eater because then people would sing about me and I could fly down and eat them because I hate that song.

Jack Handey

To make time fly, throw your watch out the window.

Anonymous

You know the oxygen masks on airplanes? I don't think there's really any oxygen. I think they're just to muffle the screams.

Rita Rudner

Getting on a plane, I told the ticket lady, 'Send one of my bags to New York, one to Los Angeles, and one to Miami.' She said, 'We can't do that!' I told her, 'You did it last week!'

Henny Youngman

You can talk to yourself and you can answer yourself, but if feel the need to pardon yourself, that's when you know something's wrong.

Anonymous

Ladies and gentlemen thank you for flyign xyz airlines, we hope you enjoyed your flight as much as we enjoyed taking your money. Please remember to take all your belongings. Anything left behind will be distributed evenly among crew members.

Anonymous