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Time is a great teacher, but unfortunately it kills all its pupils ... - Louis Hector Berlioz
Rating: 3.24/5
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Friendship is like peeing on yourself: everyone can see it, but only you get the warm feeling that it brings.
Rating: 3.2/5
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The man who smiles when things go wrong has thought of someone to blame it on. - Robert Bloch
Rating: 3.2/5
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It's true that we don't know what we've got until we lose it, but it's also true that we don't know what we've been missing until it arrives.
Rating: 3.14/5
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Men are like parking spots, the good ones are taken and the free ones are handicapped.
Rating: 3.13/5
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Never take life seriously. Nobody gets out alive anyway.
Rating: 3.11/5
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I told my wife that a husband is like a fine wine; he gets better with age. The next day, she locked me in the cellar.
Rating: 3.05/5
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Girls are like phones. We love to be held, talked too but if you press the wrong button you'll be disconnected!
Rating: 3.04/5
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The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think.
Rating: 3.04/5
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There are no stupid questions, just stupid people.
Rating: 3.04/5
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