Gravitation can not be held responsible for people falling in love.
Whoever invented knock knock jokes should get a "No Bell" prize.
Sorry I didn't pick up my phone, I got carried away dancing to the ringtone.
Never ask a starfish for directions.
My goal this weekend is to move... just enough so people don't think I'm dead.
If you hold a cat by the tail you learn things you cannot learn any other way.
I put my phone in airplane mode, but it's not flying!
Coincidence is God's way of remaining anonymous.
We are going to be best friends forever... besides you already know too much.
If I won the award for laziness, I would send somebody to pick it up for me.
For the best seat in the house, you'll have to move the dog.
Me sarcastic? Never.
Don't drink to forget me, you'll end up seeing me double.
Today is one of those days that even my coffee needs a coffee.
Side by side or miles apart real friends are always close to the heart.
The great pleasure in life is doing what people say you cannot do.
Don't worry if plan A fails, there are 25 more letters in the alphabet.
Be careful when you follow the masses. Sometimes the M is silent.
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