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Funny Quotes > Quotes Listing - Page 5

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Son, if you really want something in this life, you have to work for it. Now quiet! They're about to announce the lottery numbers. - Homer Simpson
Rating: 3.08/5
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You laugh because I'm different...........
I laugh cause I just farted!
Rating: 3.07/5
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Why is it called 'after dark' when it really is 'after light'?
Rating: 3.07/5
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He who laughs last didn't get it.
Rating: 3.07/5
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When I was kidnapped, my parents snapped into action. They rented out my room.
Rating: 3.07/5
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Behind every successful man is a surprised woman. - Maryon Pearson
Rating: 3.07/5
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When you are courting a nice girl an hour seems like a second. When you sit on a red-hot cinder a second seems like an hour. That's relativity. - Albert Einstein
Rating: 3.07/5
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There is a place you can touch a woman that will drive her crazy. Her heart. - Melanie Griffith
Rating: 3.07/5
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Car service: If it ain't broke, we'll break it.
Rating: 3.06/5
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Man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain. Lily Tomlin
Rating: 3.06/5
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