Anonymous Funny Quotes
A list of funny quotes that are written by an author that is not known or anonymous. Although not known, these amusing phrases must've had an author, so if you think you know who wrote any of them, please let us know.
Why do you wear glasses? My eyes are so beautiful they have to be kept behind glass, like a showcase.
Anonymous
When I stare at the sky, I see you. When I stare out into the ocean, I see you. When I'm looking at the moon, I see you. Geez! Would you move aside, you're constantly getting in my way!
Anonymous
I wish that all of my enemies had three cars parked in front of their house. An ambulance, fire truck and police car.
Anonymous
It takes real skills to choke on air, fall up the stairs and trip over nothing. I have those skills.
Anonymous
If my life was an action movie, my boss would be the spy trying to sabotage my mission, and my mission would be going on Facebook.
Anonymous
Last night the Internet stopped working so I spent a few hours with my family. They seem like good people.
Anonymous
Pro Tip: In the event of a tornado or other such natural disaster, place weiners and/or cheese slices in your pockets so the search dogs can find you first.
Anonymous